Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Ten Things I Would Never Do

Yeah I know this one's been floating around the Britblogs for a while, but a few people have tagged me to do mine, so just for the hell of it, here goes, seeing as Amiee is in bed with a crashing headache, I am not in the mood to start the last big Unit of my Childcare NVQ tonight and I'm reasonably up to date on my emails.

1. Vote for any Party which advocates Britain remaining in the EU.

2. Vote for any Party which advocates net Immigration into Britain.

3. Allow anyone I see wearing of those charming Hamas bandanas or a Hezbollah T-Shirt to be able to walk away from the moment with their teeth remaining.

4. Stand for Prime Minister (for my family's sake).

5. Let my daughter's first boyfriend escape our first meeting with his underwear unsoiled.

6. Trust my ex-wife.

7. Not listen to music for 24 hours solid.

8. Allow anyone to seriously use the phrase 'Good Conservative Eurosceptic' in conversation or especially during the Q & A section of a Public Meeting without throwing something at them.

9. Not be there for a mate who really needed me.

10. Stop Fighting Back. And before you ask the obvious, I refer you to James Dean...

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Fulfilling All The Cliches

Once upon a time the cliche of the totally out of touch Tory was a byword in British politics. It used to be that the patrician Conservative with his and hers matching four by fours and three kids named Tarquin, Rosamund and Arabella was accused (with justification or not) of not having the faintest clue how the man on the street lived.

Some things really never change. Whilst Tarquin, Rosamund and Arabella are now generally just as likely to be scions of Labour and Lib-Dem great houses as Conservative ones, there is still something really special about the sheer ignorance about daily life shown by the smug, grinning new crop of Blu-Labour Cameronites. 'Special' like bowel surgery is special.

Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado I give you Iain Dale, proving that Blu-Labour's rising stars (and deeply informed and clever pundits, let us not forget - after all our Iain has his own TV Show on politics and everything) are capable of being every bit as ignorant of real life as their Party ancestors, but with a special Cameron twist. Yes, the cliche has now extended itself to a truly global scale.

"Shout Out Liverpool alerts me to the Iraqi Roulette blog, which details every day life in downtown Baghdad. Horrifying reading. Is it really this bad?"

Oh. My. God.

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Saturday, December 02, 2006

Beirut, Best Place In The World You Know

Apparently women in Beirut know 'how to present themselves properly' and not look like 'ladies of the evening' in their 501's. They certainly arent perpetuating racist stereotypes of black men by posting their pictures on the Internet after being sexually assaulted by them. Presumably they also dont get assaulted by scum like the one Jackie Danicki describes, being too busy dodging crowds of Hezbollah supporters (what exactly did that scumbag Siniora expect after spending the entire Israel-Lebanon conflict praising Hezbollah and calling them heroic martrys?) and pieces of Cabinet Minister.

Some of the comments on the poor woman's post make you want to weep, they really do.

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