Friday, September 01, 2006

The Collateral Damage Of The Christ

(Not as punchy a title as, say Mel 'Its the Jooz Fault Officer' Gibson might have come up with, but what the hell...)

On BCBBC News...

"Church Leaders, the United Nations and senior Labour MPs tonight have expressed their opposition to continued Christian aggression against idolaters, panderers and usurers in what will become Occupied Palestine. Far-Right Fundamentalist Christian extremist Jesus Christ attacked a temple with indiscriminate use of whips and possibly even chemical weapons, causing enormous collateral damage to the peaceful inhabitants."

You think I'm being totaly surreal? No, I'm not a proper surrealist (well, except when I'm playing with my nine-year old and her Barbarian Baby Bears but that's another story), just a sarcastic rightwinger who likes ripping it out of the Left, particularly its ecclesiastical arm known as the CofE. This guy however, a Canon of the Church of England, is actually being SERIOUS.

"We cannot simply ignore the violent passion of Jesus cleansing the temple with whips. We are never told of the collateral damage possibly resulting from his action ..."

(via Laban Tall)



Anonymous Dumb Brit said...

Well, that works for me. This moron is basically saying that Christians are on the same level as murder-bombers, who, of course, need to be 'understood' and coddled. Pass the axe, I feel a crassly immoral crusade coming on. What's that? It's not immoral to repel invaders and attack the abomination of desolation standing where it ought not to be? Tell it to Canon Gray, I'm busy planning Crusades...

3:49 AM  
Anonymous religion of pee said...

Here's a list of things that spook Muzzies:

Freakin' weird. It's way beyond superstitious! More like a bad case of OCD.

I particularly like the following:

141. If a page from the holy Qur'an, or any sacred object like a paper on which the names of Almighty Allah or the Holy Prophet or the holy Imams are written, falls in a lavatory, it is obligatory to take it out and make it Pak with water, no matter what expenses it may entail. And, if it is not possible to take it out, the use of that lavatory should be discontinued till such time when one is certain that the page has dissolved and petered out.
So next time you visit an infested area, take a copy of the Koran (Arabic version - I don't think translations count) and whenever you feel the need, drop a page down, pee on it, but don't flush!

12:01 PM  
Blogger Murray said...

Her barbarian what now?

Should I be making armour for teddy's?

Hey relgion of pee, on behalf of everyone named Murray please find another name for Muslims.


10:35 PM  
Blogger Dangerouslysubversivedad said...


It goes like this. I help run a roleplaying Convention (now Britain's biggest as the former owner of that title has folded) called Conception.

There is a lovely lady called Carol who runs some games and has a chainmail stall there, and she also sells teddy bears and the like in their own chainmail. Two years ago I won the Gamesmaster's raffle and she had donated a teddybear in chainmail bra and thong which I naturally had to claim for my daughter. The thong (as they have a tendency to do) broke and the two locked together became a chainshirt for the teddy...

...who became Morkahn, the Barbarian Baby Bear. There is now an entire school of Barbarian Baby Bears including a very cute little brown one called Skullsplitter who regularly take classes in Advanced Goblin Decapitation.

Might all seem a little bloodthirsty but at least my nine-year old can spell words like decapitation and dismember. A lot of British kids of that age can barely spell their own names...

9:14 AM  
Blogger Serf said...

If Christian crusaders were still killing people he might have a point.


3:11 PM  

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